this is called an "update"

goddamn its been a while since i made one of these....*cracks knuckles and begins*

well to start with i've finally managed to settle down into a single predominant group of friends instead of bouncing between groups like a football on speed, seriously it got annoying switching all the time. However i am somewhat thrown into an interesting dilemma at college ( well technically 2 but seeing as its the same type of problem i figured i'd break it down ).

basically i'm friends with 2 people who hate each other and this is with 2 separate occasions (sorta).
A friend of mine (Tim) doesn't like a guy called Liam who has the same feeling but i like them both (AS FRIENDS!!!!....jesus people i'm not gay) so yeah thats a problem. There is the same problem but on an even bigger scale with my (dunno whether to say bezzie yet...what do you think kayla?) friend kayla and her EX...but i won't go in to that, HAHA you thought i would explain it didn't you, you nosy fuckers >_>.

Moving on college work is surprisingly up to spec (sorta) but nothing major is wrong at the moment. I am short on money and i need to buy several things (EMA provides but hell i gotta buy a bus pass beforehand....fucking cheap college i have needs too and they're NOT porn related >__>) but more important stuff coming up is christmas time (which means presents to give..) and i'm planning on buying rockband 2 and a guitar again (which in total is £45 so not TOO bad) and there's new year and i need to buy YET ANOTHER E-string and other stuff as such and JESUS CHRIST I DON'T SHUT UP!!!

Something important that happened to me is i finally told my mother to leave me alone and get out of my life....It was a hard thing to say but she deserves it after all the stuff she has done and will do to mess up my life. Whether or not she listens is her lookout but i warned her so MEH.

Today wasn't a fun day though i got soaked =[

the reason is i went kaylas house (she had her room done up all swish and i was curious) and it looks pretty sick (in a good way)....I'm jealous because my room looks like someone let off a bomb in there >_> However it was all for a good cause as i needed to buy alcohol for bonfire night...let the fireworks ROLL!

thoughts on adulthood :

yeah now that i have really thought about it becoming 18 has really changed my life alot. I think i should be a more serious person now however i can still have my fun from time to time. Its really weird to think though that all my friends are technically still "kids" and i'm an adult. Those sorts of things really mess your mind up (the sorta mindfuck you get when you sniff up about 3 paintpens then smoke a whole cannabis plant and go round looking like a panda all day). Even though i'm an adult i still get depressing style thoughts from time to time but most of the time i live with it. Hopefully i'm not gonna have another episode like i did a couple of years back when i was seriously contemplating killing myself. But thats all done and its the past ( and my philosophy is to forget the past because it can't really help you for the future ).

Damn thats some rant i did....i'm really starting to turn into the feminist that rachel said she reckoned i was (in other words....NEVER SHUTTING UP!!!)